zoom-escaper-lets-you-sabotage-your-own-meetings-with-audio-problems,-crying-babies,-and-more

Zoom Escaper lets you sabotage your own meetings with audio problems, crying babies, and more

Had enough Zoom meetings? Can’t bear another soul-numbing day of sitting on video calls, the only distraction your rapidly aging face, pinned in one corner of the screen like a dying bug? Well, if so, then boy do we have the app for you. Meet Zoom Escaper: a free web widget that lets you add an array of fake audio effects to your next Zoom Call, gifting you with numerous reasons to end the meeting and escape, while you still can.

You can choose from barking dogs, construction noises, crying babies, or even subtler effects like choppy audio and unwanted echoes. Created by artist Sam Lavigne, Zoom Escaper is fantastically simple to use. All you need do is download a free bit of audio software called VB-Audio that routes your audio through the website, then change your audio input in Zoom from your microphone to VB-Audio, and play with the effects.

You can watch a video tutorial on how to set up Zoom Escaper and listen to a sample of the various sound effects here:

If you’re running Zoom Escaper, you can’t actually hear the sound effects yourself. But I was able to test the site’s functionality with the help of my colleague, Verge news editor Chaim Gartenberg. Here was his opinion of the various effects Zoom Escaper had to offer:

  • Urination: “That sounds very fake. Also, I’m not entirely sure what the plan is to sell this as a reason to leave a call?”
  • Construction: “This sounds like you literally stood in the middle of a construction site. I think the sounds need to be a bit more muffled to sell it, but it’s very good.”
  • Man Weeping: “Those are the sobs of a broken man. But who’s crying — is it your roommate, your partner?”
  • Bad Connection: “This one works really well. Your audio is coming through broken up and disrupted. Get off the call.”
  • Echo: “Extremely annoying and very convincing. This sounds like a busted Zoom connection. If someone I was speaking to had this, I’d tell them to get it fixed. It wouldn’t be feasible to have a meeting with that.”
  • Wind: “If you were trying to skive off work, I’m not sure how you’d convincingly sell gale force winds in your own office.”
  • Dog: “That sounds very real. It sounds like a dog barking outside, but maybe not the sort of thing you’d need to take care of?”
  • Upset Baby: “That baby sounds decently upset! This is definitely something you should go and check on! Go and take care of your baby!”

Our opinion was that Upset Baby provided the most excusable reason to drop a call, but also requires that people believe you have a baby. And if you’re prepared to fake the existence of a child in order to get out of Zoom meetings with your co-workers, then perhaps you have bigger issues with work than a few annoying video meetings.

Zoom Escaper isn’t the first of Lavigne’s projects to self-inflict computer harm. His 2017 work The Good Life let users sign up to receive 225,000 emails confiscated from Enron during its 2001 implosion, while 2016’s Slow Hot Computer is a website that… makes your computer run slow and hot. “Use it at work to decrease your productivity,” says Lavigne.

If Zoom Escaper isn’t direct enough for you, there’s also Zoom Deleter, another of Lavigne’s creations. As he writes on his website, this is just a small program that runs in your menu bar or system tray: “It continually checks for the presence of Zoom on your computer, and if found, immediately deletes it.”

Speaking to The Verge, Lavigne describes the underlying ethos of his art as: “Deliberate slowdown, reducing productivity and output, self-sabotage, etc.” When asked by The Verge why these values were important to him, Lavigne did not respond.

apple-discontinues-homepod,-but-homepod-mini-will-live-on

Apple discontinues HomePod, but HomePod Mini will live on

Apple is discontinuing the original, full-size HomePod and will now focus its speaker efforts on the HomePod mini, the company told TechCrunch on Friday evening.

Here is what Apple said in a statement to TechCrunch:

HomePod mini has been a hit since its debut last fall, offering customers amazing sound, an intelligent assistant, and smart home control all for just $99. We are focusing our efforts on HomePod mini. We are discontinuing the original HomePod, it will continue to be available while supplies last through the Apple Online Store, Apple Retail Stores, and Apple Authorized Resellers. Apple will provide HomePod customers with software updates and service and support through Apple Care.

The Space Grey model of the full-size HomePod is already sold out on Apple’s online store.

The full-size HomePod had great sound quality, but it was criticized for its high $349 price tag at launch. Apple eventually dropped the price to $299 in April 2019, and came out with the $99 HomePod mini last year.

The move isn’t altogether surprising; sales of the HomePod have reportedly been low, and in our review, we felt that the HomePod mini offered good sound for its size.

Intel’s Raja Koduri Teases Xe HPG GPU Development Board

(Image credit: Raja Koduri/Twitter)

A star engineer, Raja Koduri is one of the Intel executives who tends to reveal development progress of upcoming products via social media. A couple of months ago, he announced that the first GPU based on Intel’s Intel’s Xe HPG architecture had powered on, and this week, he seemingly teased the bring-up process of Intel’s upcoming entrant into the best gaming graphics card race.

From 2012 to 2021 – same Intel Folsom lab, many of the same engineers with more grey hair , I was at Apple back then, getting hands on with pre-production crystalwell, 9 years later playing with a GPU that’s >20x faster! pic.twitter.com/RgmRJuhOXwMarch 12, 2021

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“From 2012 to 2021 — same Intel Folsom lab, many of the same engineers with more grey hair,” Raja Koduri, general manager of Architecture, Graphics, and Software at Intel, wrote in a Twitter post Thursday. “I was at Apple back then, getting hands on with pre-production Crystalwell, nine years later playing with a GPU that is >20x faster!”

The two pictures Koduri included show him running some tests on two development systems: one based on Intel’s Haswell with Iris Pro 5200 graphics equipped, a 64MB eDRAM package (Crystalwell) from 2012 and another powered by an upcoming Intel Xe. He didn’t specify the GPU as Xe HPG specifically, but the running of 3DMark, as well as the video outputs point toward the gaming-focused GPU.

The second image partly reveals the Xe bring-up board. Such boards are designed to provide maximum flexibility in terms of GPU configuration and power delivery, so while they have display outputs, they do not look like graphics cards at all. That said, it’s not surprising to see the Xe HPG development board come with a cooling system that looks like it belongs with a server CPU. 

Koduri’s photo zoomed in (Image credit: Raja Koduri/Twitter)

It’s also interesting to see Koduri says that the Xe GPU was over 20 times faster than Intel’s Iris Pro 5200 from 2013. Of course, an upcoming discrete graphics processor should be an order of magnitude faster than an eight-year-old integrated GPU. And “>20x  faster” could mean a range of things (not that we would expect Koduri to share performance numbers at this stage).

For some comparison, Intel’s Iris Pro 5200 with 40 execution units (EUs) and 128MB of eDRAM scores 1,426 graphics points in 3DMark FireStrike. By contrast, the latest Intel Iris Xe G7 integrated GPU with 96 EUs scores between 5,800 and 5,900 graphics points, making it over four times faster than its ancestor in  said benchmark. 

Modern discrete graphics cards, such as Nvidia’s GeForce RTX 3060 Ti, score around 31,000 graphics points in 3DMark FireStrike, so they are, indeed, over 20 times faster than Intel’s Iris Pro 5200. Meanwhile, Nvidia’s top-of-the-range GeForce RTX 3090 scores between 52,000 and 53,000 graphics points in 3DMark Firestrike (37 times faster than the Iris Pro 5200). 

We can’t draw any firm conclusions on Intel Xe HPG’s performance based on Koduri’s tweet. But if by over 20 times faster, the exec meant something close to 20 times faster, then we can expect the GPU to compete against products like the GeForce RTX 3060 Ti. We’ll have to wait for much more information to see.